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Dec 29



Three dates in a week.

This may seem infinite simile to the alpha males out there but for a guy whose love life has always been with my younger sister who even now days neglects me and my other love being football was also going down the drain considering Arsenal’s start of the season, this was huge and I sure as hell was not gonna blow it. You see guys; I was always the shy kid who sat at the back of the class who apparently thought girls to be vampires. My friends even at one point thought I was gay (I hope they are reading). To give you a better understanding of the situation, allow me to profile one of my dates.

Mitchell (Hilton chic)

I am pretty sure you remember her; she is the chic who nearly melted my loins with hot coffee. It was really a blessing in disguise, my loins took one for the team and I on the other hand got her number. Mitchell grew up from a wealthy family thus It was no rocket science that she was used to finer things in life and I, truthfully speaking was the last person in the world to provide that for her. My salary wasn’t even enough to support me and my siblings. I had even considered cancelling the date for obvious reasons (financial constrains) but mike convinced me to experiment; besides it was on my bucket list. Such chic’s were normally way out of my league in fact I was always satisfied with them friend zoning me. With Mitchell I had to pretend, for one she knew I was a lawyer (I worked as a financial officer in a law firm) but in my defense I only told her I work for a law firm.

The night prior to my date with Mitchell I visited mike who had been very helpful, in fact I had to spend the night there. We were busy searching for a perfect place that would suit Mitchell. Finally Mike suggested Chaka ranch which was about 2 hour drive from Nairobi. I didn’t sleep, for some reason I was very excited and the night seemed longer than usual. Thank God Mike had taught me call of duty because at least it kept me busy throughout the night.

Mike stays at Kileleshwa not very far from town so there was no rush morning. We played x box for a while until I could not hold my excitement anymore. I went to the shower and prepared myself. Concerning the budget, I had put aside 4000 thousand shillings. This was probably not going to be enough but I couldn’t dent my salary. A little more dent and I would be forced to sleep hungry all week. Mike had also been extra helpful; asking again would be too much. By quarter past 8 I was done, mike called Mary his nanny and asked for her opinion on how I looked. She smiled and with an effort said “perfect”. Everything was in place and I was ready to leave. Mike threw me his car keys as we got out, I went straight for his Toyota mark x but the doors would not open. Mike smiled and pointed inside the garage. It appeared to be a car and as I raised the curtain I was shocked beyond words. To any car fanatic out there like me, any car made in Germany especially Mercedes Benz automaker is worth dying for a ride. The car was a Mercedes-Benz s-class (W221). Just imagine being on an airplane that uses the road. I quickly arose from my momentary shock and told Mike I wasn’t trying to make a big impression and that the Toyota mark x was fine. My other concern was if anything were to happen on the road that would damage the car.

With its extra new features it is less possible to get an accident with the s-class, it has night view assistance, speedtronic adjustable speed limiter and a distronic controlled cruise control that helps to maintain a safe distance to other vehicles. He knew I knew this which is why he entered the mark x and we raced to town (obviously I won). Mike left me outside Hilton hotel waiting for my date; he was headed to meet his folks in town. “Any scratch on it and I will kill you”, mike joked as he sped off. I arrived on time but was forced to wait for another 30 minutes or so. I have to admit though; it was worth the wait, because when she did come out, she nearly caused an accident. Some mzungu almost knocked someone (was too busy staring). It is not normally me like to take advantage of situations but this one was too tempting to resist. I approached her, held her as tight as I could as she kissed me on the cheek. I tried as much as I could to make the hug last longest. We walked past some dude and his chic but despite her chic having the hugest bottom I had ever seen, the unlucky chap was caught red handed staring at Michelle’s ass by her chic. I really can’t blame the guy or any other guy for that matter. Michelle wore a brightly yellow dress which fitted her body, exposing every inch of curve. It was like she was born in it. The embassava touts would die of anticipation at how short her dress was as it effortlessly struggled to hug her bulging buttocks. Her bra was slightly smaller than her rebellious breasts, making them spill over. Now, I love boobs and ass as much as any other guy but Michelle’s eyes were unique. They seemed expressive and hypnotic yet soulful at the same time, as if they seeked clarity in obscurity wherever they wandered.

I offered my hand (her high heeled stilettos seemed to cause a problem) as we headed for the car. “Nice ride’, she exclaimed as I opened the car for her. That was probably the first romantic thing I have ever done in my life. Well, there was a time I gave a village chic a ride on my bicycle (comes close to opening that door).

As she sat on the leather seat, her skirt pulled up and exposed her yellow succulent thighs( guess we now know the major cause of road accidents). She would often catch me stealing glances. We got know each other and to some extent I began develop an interest. My concentration was in some way split in two, there was Mitchell and the graceful car. Its V8 engine surpassed my expectation. The command and respect it got on the road was like no other.

By 11 we were in Nyeri and minutes later in the ranch. It was both our first time there though I lied I had been there severally. Surprisingly enough I saw two other German whips there. We arrived together with some guy (they arrived a bit earlier) who arrived on a Toyota vitz but the treatment was different; he was neglected while I on the other hand was treated with respect infact an escort was sent for me. I chased the guy and told him to serve the other guy first. “An activist with a good taste in cars”, Mitchell remarked. I smiled as we went to the reception holding our hands together (if only he knew that am always an underdog and that I didn’t even own a car).

As we were chatting days before the date, Mitchell had told me that she always wanted to ride horses and motor bikes which is why this ranch seemed perfect for our date. She had also never been to a ranch before, so I was doing great on my part. Each us took a quad bike and raced around the track. I sped past Mitchell and splashed her with mud all over; she retaliated minutes later but missed me by an inch. I also beat her to the Finnish line where upon alighting; she pushed me to the mud. As she leant out her hand to me, I pulled her and both of us were drenched in mud. Other revelers jumped in, it was like mud Olympics (it was really fun). We felt like kids again, playing as hard as ever. After changing, we went to the food court where we had some bbqs and nyama choma whilst viewing Mount Kenya. After an hour of strolling round the ranch (it has an awesome dam view), we rested under a shade. She laid her head on my heavily built chest (am not bragging), it was the best feeling ever .I on the other began caressing her hair smoothly making my way to her back .There was a moment of silence for almost a minute then she muttered” I really like you Brian”, this got off guard but I managed to mumble a “me too’, before anything went wrong.

After that” Dr Phil” moment, we went to ride the horses. She chose a white one and I chose a black one. Mitchell is a fast learner because in a matter of minutes she was overlapping me in the field. You should have seen her on the horse, her smile exposed white set of pearls expanding her rosy dimpled cheeks. All these activities made her eyes glow like Mona Lisa’s. I was momentarily dumb founded as I admired her smile.

it was soon time to leave and go back to reality. On the bright side my budget was not heavily scarred unlike my emotional bank which was drained empty. I almost forgot to open the door for her (was not used to). We were both laughing as we drove out of Nyeri town. It was a day well spent and one to be remembered and treated as a holiday till I die.

At about 6 pm, we arrived in Nairobi, she alighted off and I accompanied her inside (Hilton). I had always wanted to offer a lady my jacket and this moment wouldn’t have been more perfect. I pulled her closer and embraced her with my jacket, she just giggled. We both entered the lift and luckily enough we were alone inside. She turned such that we were facing each other, her eyes pierced through mine as I expected, she then leaned forward and I took care of the rest. A deep kiss it was, the lift buzzer interrupted us so we alighted. I still was not sure if I would get lucky enough to get laid although I was hopeful. She opened her apartment door and before I had time to remove my shoes she grabbed me and threw me on the sofa. Her full weight pressed on my body but I was too busy fantasizing to feel it. We were kissing when we heard a knock on the door, at first we ignored it thinking it was room service but the knock persisted.

Mitchell tidied herself and went to open the door, upon opening the door she shouted “daddy”, You can’t possibly imagine how shocked I was, I literally froze. I quickly picked up a newspaper and pretended to read it.”I’m with a friend”, she told the mammoth of the figure as she led him to where I was. The huge figure stretched out its hand; I quickly rose up and with respect shook it. Mitchell’s dad was tall with broad shoulders and very intimidating muscles. He was dark with a stern look that seemed to be permanent. His voice boomed throughout the room,”habari kijana?” (How are you young man). “Mzuri”, I replied humbly. I couldn’t spend any more time in there; my new shirt was drenched in sweat already.

With a flimsy excuse of my car needing service for the next day I got out of there. Mitchell gave me a push to the lift where we also kissed passionately before some rudefamily interrupted us.” I’ll call you”, I shouted as we bid each other goodbye. The day had been a total success, the date was awesome, the status of the car was okay and the experience was exhilarating. In the car I played Pharrel Williams happy song because I was indeed happy. Within minutes I was at mike’s place and the first thing he asked was the status of his car. I laughed as I assured him that it was okay. I then told him everything thathappened. Both of us were in tears as I finished telling the tale. Mike then gave me a ride to my place and at exactly 11 I was in my bed fantasizing about the day’s events. It was really a remarkable day for me. I soon was taken hostage by sleep ending a lovely day for me….

Time to prepare for my second date………………………..

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