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Mar 08

Sigei

Campus Panorama

Ever heard of the phrase 'you never know it until you have experienced it'? Well, me too[I just made that up]. If you haven’t been to campus then you have no idea what you are missing. It's like the promised land of every teenager, but in this case for you to get there, you must have a ticket[either good grades or money]. I have taken the liberty to highlight some milestones that defines a typical campus.

1. UNCLE/DAD HELB

This tops my list and you know why? Ask any campus student the longitude and latitude location of Anniversary Tower. It's one of those must-know places just like base ya chapo mbili na mix. This loan is not really for students but rather EABL since a lion's share ends up in their pockets. On the brighter side, there are those few who put it to good use like paying fees or buying gadgets[we call it digital migration]. This is the time you hear rooms blasting with high volumes of latest hits in a bid to outdo each other. Another indication is that for that short period, students will be riding high in lecturers mess or other expensive places.

2. ASSIGNMENTS/EXAMS

Degree ni harambee. Another popular slogan. Perhaps the reason why it doesn't go unmentioned in campus talks. I always find it funny that lecturers insist on giving out assignments yet they clearly know only one student will do it and the rest, 99% will copy paste. Plus there is no way of finding the original compiler of the work. If there is one motto campus students apply most during exams, it must be “divided we fall in unity we stand”. Trust me even if there were cctvs in the exam rooms or better still German shepherd dogs one thing is for sure, students will always be students. Some popular methods includes use of the infamous mwakenya or God's given talent also known as a hawk-eyes. A case where one guy whispers to another guy seated four rows infront of him to tilt his work to the 'right angle' makes for a well-known scenario.

3. EXILES

Don’t think of the Miguna Miguna or Githongo type of exile. This is an entirely different kind of exile. They say it takes half a man to be exiled but a real man to be the 'exiler' [actually I am the guy who said it]. Exiles are very common in campuses, your roommate has finally landed the” P” he has been chasing throughout the semister and as the good roommate you are, you look for somewhere else to crash. There are however roommates who take it too far, almost 'exiling' their poor friends 6 times a week. So it helps to know whether your room mate is a MAN or HALF A MAN.

4. PONYOKA NA FRESHA PROMOTION

Just like any other promotion terms and condition apply. This type of promotion happens at most three times a year depending on the university. Not anyone can participate in such a promotion. One must be a senior in that campus. One must also be good in the art of deception. This promotion only lasts until the freshaz have known the ropes which usually takes close to a month. If you think you have the qualifications feel free to participate.

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